My First Christmas...

It forces the store-house of memories to trace down as far as it can.............faded memories of a chilly December morning.....that one different dawn,when the blanket doesn't seem warm enough to lure about the extra five minutes of nap...the dream of an old bearded man stepping to our bedrooms,clad in red and white....the bedside-socks brimming with glittering presents,restless to get unwrapped....the incessant queues at the church gates...the greenery of the Christmas tree accompanied with balls,bells and 'Bethelem'....the unmatched taste of 'mom-baked' chocolate cake....the queue for fruit cakes before Firpos....holding the fingers of parents amidst the evening glitz of Park Street...the nostalgia of Flurys and Waldorf....dinners at Bar-B-Q and Peter Cat....the Park Street Santa with his inexhaustible stuff of Eclairs.....the sound of our first tantrums on a winter morning.................
Memories of 'A First Christmas' reminisces one the city of his times............

And yet........tracing down my own memory lane,I could never encounter any memories as such.

But I did have a First Christmas.......may be not with parents........but somebody, very special.

That was 2007......................the year of my rebirth.

Thrill had made me too afraid to hold that hand while stepping into the church.
And yet........................too reluctant to leave its grasp.

The noise of the ringing church bells seemed to have mingled with the pounding noise of my heart in a fashion, rhythmic enough to leave an everlasting imprint on my mind.It made me lose my ability to fathom where my senses were taking me along.It was probably not my senses........for I had lost the strength to sense the world anymore.
My world got reduced to a lump of muscle, creating those mixed feelings, and a host of forgotten and unscathed desires.

The evening glitz of the most hip street in the city........seemed to have faded out.For I had become blind........blind out of ecstasy in the touch of that warm grasp.The nostalgia may be still was the same.....as suggested by the crowd before the Flurys gate. But that was still a different Christmas. For that evening, I got my childhood back. That warmth of one pull of arms, grasp of palms and whisper of words got me stuck in a whirlpool of times.........times of a 'seemingly' bygone era, boistering with noises, laughter, memories and tantrums, making me feel once again......like a child.

It made me oblivious of the ups and downs in life.......of what came and what is to come.For I knew nothing of the world, nothing of sorrow, nothing of the hard times in life.........when one looks up seeking a hand,and there's not one to lend that. That one evening dragged me back to my ideal world of dreams, where there's everyone to caress, worry, love and care; the bliss of a world.....which we leave behind with our childhood, and never again get to look back.

The hurricane of the times of past....circled around me with swirling thoughts....and reflected through my eyes......brimming with dreams........and bursting with tears, in the event of their fulfilment in life.

The city continues to glitter with its same, renewed vigour...and so does the one awaited chilly December morning,with its promise of nurturing dreams........and making them come true, on some other wintry dusk.

That was 2007................................the year I found the love of my life.

The year of my rebirth.